(Jeffy) Hey daddy what doing?
Jeffy, what is that? ME
Uh! x1
Jeffy...
Uh! x2
Wha-what is that?
(JEFFY) It's a voice changer, Daddy.
See? Watch.
Uh! x3
Hey, Daddy.
I stuck my finger in my butt.
"Ahh!" You don't know who's talking now.
Who am I, Daddy? Uh! x4
Jeffy, just p-p--
Jeffy, put that up! It's annoying, Jeffy!
(GRUNTING)
Hey! :D ([Hey]
Daddy, why'd you take my toy?
Anyway, Jeffy, it's time for you to go to bed. Jeffy.
*Aww, Daddy, I don't want to go to bed yet!*!
Well, it's bedtime. Come on.
*sigh* Okay, Jeffy, are, you, ready, for, bed?
*What does it look like, Daddy? I'm hoppin' my ass off.*
Jeffy, I told you that you can't listen to Hop Hop before bed!
!LOOP
(GASP)
Stupid song!
(Abusive father smashes retards's iPhone Xbox)
Loop
Well, Fuck you, Daddy!
You know what? Go to bed, Jeffy!
(BLEEP) Good night, Jeffy!
"Daddy, I wish you would just disappear so I could do whatever I want."
Well, Jeffy, I'm not going anywhere, so Good night! Go to bed!
(AUTISTIC NOISES) (BLEEP)
Mario Daddy: Finally, Jeffy's asleep now I have the whole night all to myself.
Mario: I'm just gonna sit back and relax.
(PHONE RINGING)[IPhone]
Wha? My grandpa?
Why is he calling me?
Uh, hello?
H-Hello? Stupid calculator. Can you hear me?
Kideo!
Uh, Grandpa?
Uh, Globedeegook?
No, it's not Gobledeegook, It's Mario.
Uh, Martiego??
Uh, yeah, sure?.
Grandpa, what do you need??..,,!!
Grandpa: Look, Danny, my TV isn't working.
*retard*!
Your TV's not working?
$Uh, no no, I pushed all the buttons and it ain't coming on.
*retard*
"Well di-did you press the on button?"
U-uhp.
'hold on.',
O-oh Yep, There it goes!
w-Wait, now it's just making loud noises and there's no picture, its' just macaronio.
Grandpa, that sounds like a microwave,
It ain't NO GODDAMN MICROWAVE! I KNOW WHAT A MICROWAVE LOOKS LIKE!?!?.
JUST GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE AND HELP ME.
Uh- Okay. Fine, grandpa, I'll come and help you with the TV.
Thomas!
Damn it. (BLEEP)
Okay, what do I do?
Do I go over there and bring the Jeffy??
Maybe it's asleep.
Hold on.
(AUTISTIC SNORING)
Is it sleeping?
*autistic grunt*
Okay, Jeffy's asleep.
I don't have to wake him up, it's'cause if i wake him up he'll never go back to sleep.
Okay, I'll just be gone for 10 minutes.
Nothing bad can happen in 10 minutes.
brb I'll be back
Alright, I'll be back in 10 minutes.
(SNORING)
(FARTING)
Uh oh! Someone pooped in my pants..
DADDY!!!!!!!!!!!
"So, Daddy, the craziest thing happened! Someone pooped my- Daddy?"
Daddy, where you go??
DADDY!
DADDY, WHERE YOU AT?
DADDYYYY.
DADDYYYY!
"Where my daddy go? Did he disappear??"
The issue is that Bowser, Junior, Chef Pee Pee, Black Yoshi, and Shrek live with him. If anything Jeffy is the opposite of home alone.
*sight*
*sigh*
Why can't videos make sense, Logan?
*ELF SLAMO TABLEO*
*Puts on Hop Hop* (YAY)
(Pouring Cheerios On Table Bowl)
(Humping)
What are you doing, Jeffy Jeffy? Jeffy!
Wait a minute!
[Jeffy]: Hey! :D (Wow, oh my god retard)
(Pouring Cherrios In Bathtub)
What the heck, Jeffy?! Don't do that in the bathtub. Besides, You would fuck up everything!
Awwwww, S*i*t!
(RESUMES STICKING "CHEF PEE PEE" IN CHERRIOS)
****, (CALLING)
Hello, thank you for calling Long John's Pizza.
What can I (do) you for today?
(DISTORTED JEFFY) Can I get a large pepperoni pizza?
W-Sir why do you sound like that?
Jeffy: Uh, uh, uh!
(SOUND GRUNTING)
[MRS. COCKINS]
SIR, SIR! I-I-I can't understand you.
OOF OOF OOF OOF.
I am YOUR Father.
(Thomas Hop hop hop!!!)
OH C'MON MATE! WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!
WE HAVE TO DELIVER THE PACKAGE TO THE BOSS!
I'm just gonna deliver this one pizza,
then were gonna go drop off the cash to the boss.
AW, COME ON! IS THAT PIZZA REALLY THAT IMPORTANT?
The coustomer is always important, Simmons!
Hurry up...[GASP *sigh* GASP]
[DOORBELL] Ring-ring.
[GASP] Hagh. *sigh*
(LED GASP) My pizza's, here!
Hallo?
Hay there, little eBay. Are your parents home?
Nope. I'm all by myself.
I'm home alone, cause I'm a (me me) big boy. :)
Oh! So, I guess you ordered this pizza.
No, the *robot* did.
Yeah. Yeah, the robot.
Well, the robot owes me about like 10 dollars, plus tip.
Oh yeah, my hands are full. Just put it in my mouth.
Really?
Yeah.
Great.
(Brooklyn T. Guy Muffled) Come take your pizza.
Alright. That's, uh, that's ten dollars but what about that tip?!
(DOOR CLOSES HARDLY)
What eh? BUTTHOLE!
OOF OOF OOF. I can't wait to eat my pizza.
Nope. you're a fool.
Holy hell the retard gets a prize
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute...
'This a isn't pizza.'
(NO SHIT)
What's wrong, mate?
That little bastard didn't tip. Me!
NO TIP!? WHAT GABRIELHOLE!
Yeah, whatever.
Anyway, the boss wants to picture the money. He wants to see it.
Alright well, show it to him.
(PICTURE SNAPS)
OH MY GOD SIMMONS!
What's wrong?
THE MONEY! IT'S GONE!
I know, it's the pizza.
I KNOW IT'S A PIZZA, SIMMONS!
Wh-What are you doing?
Uh, I'm taking pictures for the boss.
Blippi!
I'm hungry.
WHAT?! DON'T SEND THAT TO THE BOSS!
...Too late.
Oh my God, Simmons. I guess I grabbed the wrong box and delivered the cash to that kid!
Now, what are we going to do now, mate?
Okay, Simmons, I-I-I... You wait here, I'm gonna try to get it back. Okay? Just-
/Alright.\
Come, on, kid, answer.
What do you want?
Oh, hey there retard. So, uh, the pizza I gave to you was the wrong pizza, and I have your pizza here so I was just thinking we could trade Yu-Gi-Oh cards.
I got an even better idea.
What's that? :)
How about you just go yourself? (BLEEP)
OH! YOU LISTEN HERE, YOU LITTLE BASTARD! I'M GONNA GET THAT MONEY!
HE WOULDN'T GIVE ME THE MONEY BACK!
HE WOULDN'T GIVE ME THE MONEY BACK!?
THE BOSS IS GONNA KILL US!
No he's not, Simmons, cuz I have a plan. We are going to break into that kid's house cuz he's home alone and we're gonna get that money!
It's time to get our ski masks, mate.
/Alright.\
I didn't get my pizza. I'm going to bed. *retard*
(MUSIC HOP HOP!!!)
(Paper *JAM* jeffy comes to life)UH!
Mayonnaise.
*GASP* BOOBIES!
Alright, Simmons, we are going to break inside this house.
How are we gonna do that, mate?
Alright, let's try the door.
Come on, open open! (You didn't say the magic words)
Awww mate, it's locked.
Aw gee, you think so? O-oh my god, Simmons. Thank you so much for telling me, cuz i never would have figured out that kind of thing.
Ya know, cuz it wasn't opening, and I'm just AN IDIOT so i never would have guessed that it could be LOCKED.
You don't have to be rude, mate.
How are we gonna get inside this house, Simmons?
Oh, let's just check under the mat and see if they left the key.
Under the mate?
Nobody does that anymore... Wha-
my neighbor does
Oh oh w-wow, they actually left the key. (what idiots)
I told you, mate.
/Alright. \
Alright, Simmons, let's look for that, money.
It should be in a pizza box.
Alright, mate.
Emm, no. Not there. No. Come on.
Where is it?
Simmons, have you found it yet?!.,
No mate, have you?
Now Simmons, why would i be asking you if you found it.
If i hadn't found it?
Ma-maybe I already found it and i just wanted to see if you'd lie to me...
DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE?!
NO OF COURSE I DIDN'T FIND IT, SIMMONS!
Geez mate, you're being very rude tonight.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry it's just the boss is gonna be really, really pissed when he finds out we lost his money.
Do you think we should call him and let him know what happened?
He's gonna be really mad, but yeah.
Simmins, I'm really nervous.
Don't be nervous, mate. He'll understand. Just let me do all the talking.
Hello, boss, we got some breaking news.
BREAKING NEWS? I DON'T LIKE BREAKING NEWS, WHAT'S UP?
Uh, well, you know that 100 thousand dollars you put into a pizza box?
Yeah. You better not have lost my 100 grand!?!
No, we didn't lose it at all.
Yes, we did. Look, I'm sorry. Look, this is what happened. We had the money in a pizza box, and I was delivering a pizza, and I accidentally delivered your money instead.
And he didn't even TIP.
YOU, IDIOTS, LOST, MY, 100, THOUSAND, DOLLARS?!?!
YOU BETTER GET IT BACK, OR AT LEAST KIDNAP THE KID SO WE CAN HOLD HIM FOR RANSOM!.!.!
OKAY, Y-Y-YES WE WILL DO THAT, BOSS. Thank you.
Okay. okay. Simmons, Let's--
I didn't even get to say bye...(:):><Kideo><Hi!><Hi.><Hi>
I know.
Let's go kidnap, that kid.
Alright, Simmons, we gotta find this kid. where is he?
I don't know, mate, but what are these bowling pins doing here?
Bowling pins? Wha... OH YEAH, those are bowling pins. What ARE they doing here? (Look up if you want to know the answer)
*Drawing Jeffy*
There's the kid, Simmins! Let's get him!
RUN, SIMMONS, RUN! UH!
OH MY GOD, SIMMONS! ARE YOU OKAY?
OF COURSE YOU ARE NOT OKAY! YOU GOT CRUSHED BY A bowling ball!
WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN WHEN WE SAW THE PINS, SIMMONS!
I-is that mayonnaisse?
Mr. Mayonnaise!
*Mad*
I'M GONNA GET YOU, KID!
The Mr. Mayonnaise.!!!
COME HERE KID YOU KILLED MY PARTNER! (He's gonna be fine in the next Kideo video) (Kid video Home Videos and Breaking News)
YOU, BASTARD!
ALRIGHT KID, YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!!
[ALRIGHT, KID, I'M GONNA GIVE YOU ONE CHANCE. WHERE'S THE MONEY?!]
I don't know. (Speaking in alien) I DON'T KNOW!
Alright, so that means we are gonna put you 'for', "ransom"!
COME ON!
"Oh man," that took so long.
Hope Jeffy's still asleep.
Hope Blippi "object" (object?)
[loop music playing]
JEFFY!
WHAF- JEFFY!
*Speaks in paper *JAM* Jeffy language* *Jeffy war* Mario rambles
Rambles and Rambling
*sigh*
Daddy, you came back?
Rambling: YES JEFFY I CAME BACK, YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!
What did i do?.,!
(Rambling): Aww, Jeffy, you are so done!
Why? are you so man, Daddy? I thought you disappeared forever.
Why is the house a mess, Jeffy? And why is there a dead guy in the house?
What dead guy?
Don't "What dead guy" me, Jeffy! there is a dead guy in the house.
Wha-
Who is this?
Hold on.
Hullo?
Hey I bet you're wondering where your kid is.
Wait, wait, what?
Yeah, we got your kid.
We holded him for ransom. :)
We're not gonna give him back unless you give us a 100 thousand dollars.
Wait, what? You got my kid?
Yeah, you wanna talk to him? Here, talk to your dad.
I sexually Identify as an apache attack helicopter. Every since I was a young boy I dreamed of attacking small bush planes an..
So if you ever wanna hear that again, you better give us our money.
B-but..
Nonononono, no buts. You gonna give us the money or not?
Uh, no.
No?
Really?
Yeah, no. I don't want to do that.
Hang on, I think i got the wrong number. Did you order a pizza earlier?
Did i order a pi...No.
My bad. Sorry, wrong number.
Wha? Oh, oh-oh? Okay..
Anyway, Jeffy. The dead guy in the house.
Hold on, Daddy. Did you see the bathtub?
Wha- B-b-bathtub?
Overall: 8.9/10
Not as good as Junior Home Alones, but this was one of the better 2017 episodes.
Hi, it's me Teh Hyper Spartan / Teh Hyper Gaming channel. And i wanna thank you for enjoying it. This subtitle was made by me and Jack Gar Hansen. Anyways, Bye. and i'm out, Thanks for watching! :)